Saturday, February 20, 2010


While I don't regret moving from Winnipeg for one second, I do often think about and miss the people that live there or those that I knew while I was living there. Lately I've been thinking a lot about my old friends back home. Sometimes I wish they were here with me, to pick up the phone and arrange plans with, to go for coffee or tea and something sweet, for drives around the city in search of vintage treasures or the perfect cupcake, for dinner and drinks or sushi, for little road trips and big laughs or just to be near. I miss having that familiarity and comfort that can only be gained through years of experience and that knowing...when someone instinctively knows what you need whether it be silence or a good bitch session.

As I get older, I realize how important these friendships are and how few and far between they can be. It's not that easy to find that connection anymore. In fact, I often liken it to dating. That whole exhausting process where you first court someone and have all of these intense feelings and expectations, then as you get to know them you begin to see them in a different light and things start to change. Sometimes, it can just fizzle unexpectedly, often times without explanation. You wonder what changed and sometimes you try to fix it but it's very real and you move on. I don't think there's anything wrong with this because it's definitely worth the try as something wonderful might transpire from it. And if it doesn't turn out the way that you imagined, that's okay, too as you wouldn't want to continue on with something that no longer brought you joy.

I'm often reminded of that horribly cheesy chain email that people love to send:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The question you sent out has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

My long-standing friendships are the ones that are effortless and natural; where I can just be myself and it's easy being around the other want to see them. Their idiosyncrasies are what make them charming and interesting (not annoying) and there is a real sense of joy when time is spent together. There's just something, some connection, that sustains any separation or moody phase where you could just pick up where you left off like it was yesterday.

To my dear friends: I'm thinking of you today and missing you. Hope to see you soon. ♥

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