Hoppy Holidays

Chocolate-covered potato chips

Yes, they're that good.

[I'm eating them as I type.]

I'm so glad

...it's Friday.

Wine and cheese

After work I went to Bistro 990 with a friend. What was supposed to be a quick drink turned into a few hours of chatting. Glasses of wine on an empty stomach are never a good idea but to be honest, it was such a nice way to end the day as I really enjoyed the lively and candid conversation. After we made a pit stop at the grocery store for Finn Crisps and cheese, we parted ways and I headed to the subway.

For anyone who's ever accused Torontonians of being unfriendly busy-bodies, I wish they had witnessed all of the friendly and lively interactions going on between complete strangers in the subway car tonight. Okay, maybe it was the buzz I was experiencing or perhaps there's a full moon out but seriously, there seemed to be so much good energy circulating about in the car tonight. I couldn't help smiling to myself as I observed.

I watched a youngster give his seat up for an elderly woman who then began chatting with his mother for the length of the subway ride, smiles being exchanged between strangers (and not in a lecherous or violating way), people making space for others to squeeze into the busy subway car and a visually-impaired man carrying on with a young woman who had shared her seat with him (actually, so it was a tad bit creepy upon closer inspection but still). I felt really happy to be part of the city and was basking in all of the love tonight.

[I blame the wine for this corny missive.]

As the effects of my buzz wane and fatigue sets in, I find myself reflecting on the bigger picture. I feel like I'm in a good place right now and I'm meeting all of these wonderful people. And even though I'm on the verge of possibly being laid off (more details to follow) and there's so much uncertainty up ahead, I still feel so hopeful that I'm heading in the right direction...wherever that takes me. Of course, this isn't to say that I'll wander about aimlessly without regard or some sort of contingency plan but I'm keeping myself open to what lies ahead because ultimately, I know it'll all work out in the end. It always does. This I know for sure.

Feels like the first time

Last night I went out with a couple of new friends for the first time. It really felt like an initiation of sorts as I introduced them to one of my el cheapo favorites - Ginger on Yonge - while they revealed interesting and intimate tidbits about themselves. Afterwards, we watched one of the worst movies I've seen this year, Cooking with Stella (which I've aptly renamed Cooking with Hella).

Thanks for the wonderful evening! Can't wait to hang out again! xo

Reunited...and it feels so good

I've been doing some experimentation lately - the kind that involves copious amounts of raw milk which has been aged and fermented into delicious rounds of goodness. Despite a recent blog post, I am happy (in fact, elated) to report that I have been reunited with one of my true loves - beautiful and glorious cheese!

[Standing ovation]

My experimentation involved "research" at St. Lawrence Market where I was tantalized and seduced by the many varieties of raw milk cheese. My favorite so far has been Comté for its complex, nutty and caramelized flavor. (Of course, there are many more to choose from and experience!) I was happy to find that there were even varieties closer to home at our local organic market such as a simple white cheddar with a savoury aftertaste. Heaven, I say...heaven.

Toasty

Hello friends! How are you? Hope you've been doing well and enjoying the last days of winter! I've missed you.

It's been awhile since I last posted and it's time to start catching up on regular blogging. Lots going on with work which has been keeping me busy and on my toes. I've also been trying to squeeze in time with my little family and friends. The other night I got together with a former classmate that I haven't seen in ages. She's such a sweetheart and so much fun. We caught up over wine and laughed for hours. She filled me in on all of the interesting things she's been up to and all of her exciting plans. She's in the midst of starting her own arts-based company that incorporates some of the assessment and counselling aspects of the program we were taking together. One of her upcoming projects involves an art installation based on a tool that she'll be administering. Very exciting, indeed! It was inspiring to hear about it and she shared some great resources with me.

I've also been connecting with a few new friends that I'm excited to get to know and spend more time with. It's been a wonderful surprise.

As for J + H, we've been watching a lot of movies and having people over lately. Today we decided to cozy up over movies, munchies and our favorite treats. It was a perfect day for it, too since it was so wet and miserable out. I love these kind of rainy days and lazy Saturdays.

Hope your Saturday's been cozy and that you're toasty. Take care and talk soon. xo

Magic Hour

I walked home from the subway station during Magic Hour today and enjoyed the smell of barbequed steak cooking in the neighborhood.

New people

This weekend was all about spending time with new people. On Saturday evening, a couple of J's friends came over for dinner - both of whom I've never really had a chance to sit and chat with. It was a nice evening of dinner, coversation and random YouTube videos.

Friday evening was spent in the company of two very interesting and lovely women which began with a delicious dinner prepared by T. The rest of the evening was spent drinking wine, grazing on treats, nibbling on chunky peach bits, sniffing Diablo and chatting or laughing. I even consumed dairy and felt perfectly fine. (I think the key might be to simultaneously drink red wine and eat cheese made only from raw milk.) It was a fun evening and I hope we get to do it again some time in the future.

Weenie roasts + picnics

It was such a dreary day today and the sidewalks were all slushy with snow.

I can't wait until it's summer again for weenie roasts and picnics.

Birthday wishes

Lastnight J, H & I went to a cozy little birthday party for a dear friend. "A" is one of those really special friends that I spoke about yesterday - where everything comes so easily and it feels good to be around each other. She's always a breath of fresh air and makes me laugh uncontrollably. We first met at her studio where I worked for her briefly. It was one of those instant connections and we've been friends ever since. While we don't often see each other in person, we like to send very candid emails to each other sharing our thoughts and crazy notions, and can always pick up where we left off.

It was so good to see her as I was feeling a bit blue about missing my friends back home. She's such a lovely person - inside and out - and I'm glad that we were there to celebrate her special day!

Hope you had a happy birthday, my friend! It was so nice to see you & T! Wishing you peace, love and happiness this year...and always. xo

Missing

While I don't regret moving from Winnipeg for one second, I do often think about and miss the people that live there or those that I knew while I was living there. Lately I've been thinking a lot about my old friends back home. Sometimes I wish they were here with me, to pick up the phone and arrange plans with, to go for coffee or tea and something sweet, for drives around the city in search of vintage treasures or the perfect cupcake, for dinner and drinks or sushi, for little road trips and big laughs or just to be near. I miss having that familiarity and comfort that can only be gained through years of experience and that knowing...when someone instinctively knows what you need whether it be silence or a good bitch session.

As I get older, I realize how important these friendships are and how few and far between they can be. It's not that easy to find that connection anymore. In fact, I often liken it to dating. That whole exhausting process where you first court someone and have all of these intense feelings and expectations, then as you get to know them you begin to see them in a different light and things start to change. Sometimes, it can just fizzle unexpectedly, often times without explanation. You wonder what changed and sometimes you try to fix it but it's very real and you move on. I don't think there's anything wrong with this because it's definitely worth the try as something wonderful might transpire from it. And if it doesn't turn out the way that you imagined, that's okay, too as you wouldn't want to continue on with something that no longer brought you joy.

I'm often reminded of that horribly cheesy chain email that people love to send:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The question you sent out has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

My long-standing friendships are the ones that are effortless and natural; where I can just be myself and it's easy being around the other person...you want to see them. Their idiosyncrasies are what make them charming and interesting (not annoying) and there is a real sense of joy when time is spent together. There's just something, some connection, that sustains any separation or moody phase where you could just pick up where you left off like it was yesterday.

To my dear friends: I'm thinking of you today and missing you. Hope to see you soon. ♥

Revisiting old ideas

On Thursday the agency I work for hosted a presentation by image consultant Nyla Hasan. It was a full house - a lively and interactive seminar that touched on the science of style and ways to transform an individual from the outside in to effect lasting results. Her idea was not merely to change a person's outer appearance in order to effect change but rather to find little ways that a person can build confidence working with what they currently have to enhance themselves. She talked about goal setting, reframing thoughts and operating from a place that was more positive which in turn allowed the person to attract more positive experiences. Many of the concepts were familiar but the way that Nyla offered them up were very insightful and relevant for those attending - predominantly unemployed individuals going through transitions in their lives.

Nyla was a wonderful presenter and shared tips on how to exude confidence even in its absence (such as the proper way to breathe and stand - again, not necessarily novel ideas but certainly things that we tend to forget on a daily basis). She disclosed her own journey from her life in Pakistan to her days as a single mother with three children at a food bank to her current situation. What she was saying seemed to resonate with those attending. I'm optimistic that it even inspired some to take time to reflect and think of ways to move forward by being good to themselves and starting off by taking baby steps.

What inspired me most was how she facilitated her seminar. Her energy was palpable and she easily established a rapport with the audience. She supplemented her speaking with visuals, role plays and open questions which really engaged everyone. She didn't just speak in a loud voice and agree with what people said. She modulated her voice and really responded to the needs of the members in the audience. She also managed the group effectively, especially when irrelevant questions and comments surfaced, which is no easy feat. As for the content of her talk, hearing other perspectives on goal setting, reframing thoughts, self-esteem and confidence were particularly helpful as these are concepts that are touched upon during the three week group workshop I co-facilitate as an Employment Counsellor. Of course, her ideas also serve as wonderful tools for use in my own life so I'm grateful that I was able to be there.

Happy Valentine's Day

Wishing you love...today and always. xo

Hello Friends

Hello Friends! It's been a while since I last posted and we're already 13 days into February! (How did that happen?) Since we last spoke - I turned one year older, found amazing treasures at my favorite junk store, spent time in Kingston visiting a very special little lady (well, two of them, really!), discovered where to buy Yorkshire Tea close to home, tried PG Tips, purchased a Zutter (♥) and felt heartbroken over the news of my cousin.

The last two weeks have been really busy with school, work and of course, family time. I've been co-facilitating a workshop with a fellow employee helping women who are going through transitions in employment. It's a three week workshop which touches on topics such as self-esteem, communication in the workplace, time and stress management and learning styles. There are various self-assessments done by the clients, as well as ample opportunity to interact with other group members through role plays, group activities and discussions. It can be a really powerful experience for some as they're doing a lot of self-reflection and working on issues that they may not have confronted until now.

I'm really enjoying group facilitation especially watching the process unfold and seeing the participants open up. I used to feel nervous at the thought of facilitating workshops and didn't think it was possible as an introvert to do a good job or be really effective but I don't think I'm the true introvert that I thought I once was. I'm excited to meet with the group and I'm finding myself feeling energized after the sessions. I think my fears came down to lack of practice so I'm really grateful for the experiences I've been gaining through work. On the flipside, I'm still really enjoying the individual counselling I've been doing with clients. Each person has a different story to share and I love learning about their career path(s) or their desire to carve a new one. The most meaningful experience of all has been helping clients find work or direction and being part of the process. The gratitude from the clients has been incredibly special and will continue to motivate me in the work that I do.

After a long and busy week, I'm going to treat myself to some craft-time with H this afternoon. We're going to put the Zutter to the test and make some little journals and gifts. In the evening, J + I are going to a birthday slash engagement party at a vegetarian restaurant we've never been to. Afterwards, we're going to a house party close to home. H is going to another sleepover tonight so all three of us will be having some fun with friends and staying up 'til the wee hours.

Hope you've been well and having a lovely February. Have a happy Saturday. Talk soon. xo

Lovely day

I'm really beginning to love Sundays. H went to a sleepover so J + I took our time getting out of bed and chatted endlessly. We had a late brunch of J's delicious scrambled tofu and our favorite tea. When H came home, the three of us pored over old photos of trips and days gone by and marveled at how much H had grown over the past three years. In the evening I filled a jar with my homemade salsa and prepared beets and purple cabbage for tomorrow's lunch. Before we put H to bed, she + I had a nice time chatting and watching part of a movie over candlelight. Lovely day, indeed. ♥

Hope your Sunday was lovely, too. Take care and talk soon. xo

Tea Tasting

Yesterday I attended a tea tasting at Tao Tea Leaf hosted by the owner and Tea Master, Tao. It was such a comprehensive workshop as Tao delved into the many facets of green and white tea including their history, health benefits, location of crops in China, methods of harvesting and processing, how the teas are graded and about the tea culture in China. Throughout the afternoon, Tao shared pictures and stories relating to the teas, as well as introduced ways of steeping tea and the traditional equipment used. In addition to this, we tried some very special varieties of each including Tao's fresh and high grade teas sold at the tea house. I also saw my first tea cake (Pu Er variety) from Tao's own private collection and found out about this intriguing type of tea.

I learned so much from Tao - his passion and knowledge made it a very interesting session. I'm looking forward to his next tea tasting!

'Til we meet again...

While I was on vacation, I ate meat and consumed dairy (and lots of it). It was damn good and I couldn't get enough of it. I blame it on Paris and its beautiful, tantalizing pastries that called out to me behind the glass counters, the plates of charcuterie on restaurant menus that boasted of handcrafted meats in various forms and the cheese...OH, the cheese! I couldn't escape it and for goodness sakes - why on earth would I? It would be like depriving one's self of a true taste of Paris (literally). I was in heaven.

When the vacation ended and I returned home, I decided to stop eating meat again (the haunting images came back in full force) but I thought I could re-introduce dairy into my life again since it seemed like my body had outgrown lactose intolerance (and honestly, I couldn't imagine going back to just Sheeze and soy cheddar). The thought of eating chevre with olives and a fresh baguette on a regular basis made me smile. And the prospect of exploring different and exotic new cheeses was exciting. Oh, the joy it would bring! I even obsessed about making homemade chevre and looked at videos and blogs telling me how. I imagined spreading the word of cheese to others and introducing the idea of cheesemaking to those who would listen.

Sadly, I was brought back to reality with the stabbing pains of lactose intolerance last night after eating a dairy-based dish. I tried again this evening - thinking (and hoping) that chevre would be a kinder and gentler friend...but not so. I don't know why my stomach didn't bother me on my travels. It's a mystery but I'm happy that I was able to indulge while I was there.

So, it's back to no meat or dairy for me. (Sheeze...sigh)

I feel restless

Perfect Sunday

Today was my idea of a perfect Sunday. I spent a large part of the morning under the covers with my computer on my lap reading blogs and sorting through photos. For breakfast, I enjoyed a big pot of Yorkshire tea and a bowl of oatmeal with craisins and brown sugar and proceeded to nibble on chevre and savoury treats throughout the day. There was no agenda but I managed to watch a movie with H, read my favorite blogs, update my own blog, drink several cups of tea (including caramel honeybush Rooibos with soy milk and sugar) and bake cinnamon oatmeal scones. For dinner, J made some delicious sweet potato soup complemented by garlic toast and after H falls asleep, J & I will cozy up to watch a horror movie.

I hope wherever you are and whatever you're doing, you're enjoying yourself. Take care and talk soon. xo

It's Monday again tomorrow. (Sigh)